Tag Archives: love

I miss her so much.

1 Feb


This is a picture of my dog Primo. She passed away right before Thanksgiving last year. Her 12th birthday would have been tomorrow. I used to make a big deal of it every year. I would get her presents and a special cookie from the dog bakery. She was my everything. She was my baby, my best friend, and my love all wrapped into one little shih tzu. There are still days where all I can do is cry my eyes out because I miss her so much. She was an amazing dog. She would come and cuddle me when I was crying. If I left the house for even 10 minutes when I got back she was overjoyed to see me. When I couldn’t sleep she was right there next to me awake. When I needed to calm down I would go and give her attention. If I was anxious about driving I would just take her along because she loved car rides. She saved my life more than once. When I found out I was not going to be able to have kids, it was a little less devastating because I had her. To say the least my heart is broken without her. And it is even harder to cope being that I can not even afford the fees to adopt a shelter dog. I never knew how expensive it was to adopt a dog in need. But that is beside the point. No dog will ever be her. I miss her so much. And because there has been a death in the family and there is a funeral tomorrow, I feel like I have to keep this hurt of it being her birthday kind of to myself. So I will just blog it into internet space and keep my tears to the secret hours of the late night.  I miss you so much Primo baby!!!!


28 Jan

DSC00092 - Version 2

This is a picture of my friend Jen at her baby shower. Isn’t she gorgeous!? I can not have babies of my own (not that I am even dating anyone) and some days that is unbearably saddening. It hurts in a very deep place in my heart. And sometimes it is hard to hear about so many of my friends and family having babies or being pregnant. But something changes once I get to see them. It makes my heart so much brighter and happy. I mean I would never deny someone I care about the happiness of a baby. I could never be sad knowing how amazing being a mom will be for them. I am so excited for all the mommies in my life.

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